


The Forty-seventh Sentinel Tidbits File by Many and Varied

by 852_Prospect_Archivist



Series: The Senad Sentinel Tidbits Files by Many and Varied [47]
Category: The Sentinel
Genre: M/M, Senslash Fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 03:59:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/793739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/852_Prospect_Archivist/pseuds/852_Prospect_Archivist





	The Forty-seventh Sentinel Tidbits File by Many and Varied

## The Forty-seventh Sentinel Tidbits File

by Many and Varied

Author's disclaimer: The characters aren't mine, these tidbits aren't mine. Honestly, I'm not responsible for any of it!  


Rating: the whole range  
Pairings: J/B (mostly!) 

* * *

Tidbit #1 

Rayden's Worst Nightmare  
by Texas Ranger 

Jim looked down into Blair's deep blue eyes and smiled sappily. "I love you, Guppy," he sighed. 

Blair rubbed his nose against Jim's and snuggled closer. "I love _you_ , Jim! Forever and always." He crawled into Jim's lap and laid his head on the big man's chest. 

No one in the bullpen even raised an eyebrow. It was SOP for Jim and Blair. The two lovemuffins continued to cuddle, coo, and simper while crime ran rampant in the city. 

Suddenly, from out of nowhere, evil slithered into the room. "Hi, guys!" Cassie chirped, tossing her improbably red hair and smoothing her latest skin- tight spandex micro. "Am I interrupting anything?" 

Jim's eyes latched on to Cassie's chest and his tongue hung out. "No, not at all," he simpered, dumping Blair to the floor and standing up to kiss Cassie's hand. "Blair was just leaving." 

Blair sputtered. "I was??" 

Jim grinned. "In fact, he's moving out tonight. Would you like to move in?" 

Cassie giggled. "Sure! On one condition: since I know how to do your job better than you do, since I've always wanted to be a detective but could never go to the Academy because of my poor lungs, from now on I get to tell you how to run your cases." 

"Deal!" Jim panted. 

Blair gaped. This couldn't be happening. 

"Cassie!" Simon strode out of his office, eyes riveted to Cassie's legs. "Good news: even though you've never been to the Academy because of your poor lungs, and wouldn't have the slightest clue how to handle yourself in a dangerous situation, how would you like to be Jim's new partner?" 

Cassie simpered. "Why, sure!" 

"Excellent! Welcome to the team!" Simon turned to Blair. "Clean out your desk, Sandburg. You'll only be in the way of our new star team." 

Tears sprung to Blair's eyes. "But, Jim...our love...what about me?" 

Without taking his eyes off Cassie's ass...ets, Jim replied, "Chief, our love was nothing but emotion. Cassie and I have a relationship firmly built on T&A. Now, go away and never come back." 

Blair ran out of the room, crying miserably. 

Jim fluttered. "I hope his loud sobs of utter heartbreak didn't disturb you, Cassie," he said. 

Cassie pursed her lips and led Jim out the door by his...hand. "Oh, I'll be okay as long as my poor lungs hold up. By the way," she said as they climbed on an elevator slick with Blair's tears, "I'm changing my name to Mary Sue." 

* * *

Tidbits #2 

Sad ObSenad for a friend: 

The panther and the wolf sat in companionable silence, the panther's tail wrapped lovingly around his mate's smaller body. 

Feline eyes that could see forever spied a tiny figure scampering toward them over the horizon. 

"Foe?" asked the wolf. 

"Good friend," answered his solute. 

"Let's make him welcome." The large canine tongue caressed the soft black muzzle next to him. They stood, then trotted in the direction of one little tiny black dog who richly deserved two such protectors. 

* * *

My friend, Panda, a small Black Pomeranian with a heart big enough to hold me in it, passed away this morning. I've sent his gentle soul on, knowing that wherever he goes next, he'll be most welcome. 

Deana  


* * *

Tidbit #3 

ObSenad: 

"Jim, Jim! Look, it says in the USA paper our show's returning on Jan. 25th." 

"Your kidding, let me see that." Jim jerked the paper out of Blair's hand. 

"Man, I can't believe it. All of our hard work, mailing, emailing, phone calls, ads, it's all paid off. I'm so proud of the tribe. Jim, hey, don't zone out, what's the matter?" 

"Blair, look, read it again. Tell me it doesn't say that!" 

Blair read the paper, his face going pale. "Oh, no." Gently touching Jim's arms, he pulled his partner around to face him. "Jim, we have to make the ultimate sacrifice, we have no choice." 

"You're right. I'm sorry, I was just being selfish." 

"That's it, big guy, we can go to bed an hour later, after all, this is about love." 

\--fini-- 

Kaci  


* * *

Tidbit #4 

ObSenad: 

"You glared at her, her heart-rate and breathing sped up, so therefore she must be lying?" 

"Yeah." 

"... Jim, that wasn't guilt. That was lust. ... Trust me." 

:-) 

Grace  


* * *

Tidbit #5 

ObSenad: 

"Uh, Chief?" 

"Yeah, Jim?" 

"I'm over here in the search engine, looking for web pages on that show we both like? You know, The Watchman? And I just found a web page with a handle of "Chief". 

Lengthy pause. 

"So? Lots of chiefs out there, Jim." 

"No doubt. But how many have the initials BS? And describe themselves as an "observer" of the human condition, past and present? Tell me that, Chief." 

"Jim?" 

"Yeah?" 

"That page is fanfiction.....slash fan fiction. May I be so bold as to inquire why _you_ would be looking for 'slash fiction'? Explain that." 

"I happen to be 'into' slash fiction....I really enjoy it. And by the way?" 

"Yes?" 

"I love yours. In your story, "Assume the Position"......just how do you think two men, in fact, two 'anybodies' could do that? And not seriously hurt themselves?" 

"Well, as a teacher I find that I must often lecture, but that my _students_ learn much better with demonstrations. Jim, are you _up_ to a demonstration of that particular position?" 

Blair never received a verbal answer. He was to busy hanging over Jim's shoulder as the bigger man literally ran up the loft stairs to the bedroom above. 

"I'll take this as a YES." 

His only answer? A growl. 

\--fini-- 

allison  


* * *

Tidbit #6 

ObSenad: 

Jim and Simon were in Simon's office facing off, their long standing disagreement about Simon's unusual selections of coffee finally coming to a head. They were standing toe to toe, face to face, even belly to belly, 'discussing' their problem. 

Blair entered the room and, upon observing the confrontation, stepped right up to Jim and Simon, trying in vain to physically separate them. He looked up at them, saying, "Guys! Guys! Isn't this a little much here? Come on..... " 

They both ignored him, treating him as if he was invisible and continued their 'discussion'. He tried several more times to gain their attention, but finally Blair realized his peace making attempts were futile. He stormed out of the office saying loudly, "God, I hate it when people keep talking over my head!" (pun intended....) Jim and Simon stopped their bickering, gave each other perplexed glances and shrugged their shoulders. In unison, they both said, "What did we do?" 

\--end-- 

galadriel,  
who still doesn't understand why almost every one in the world is taller than she is.  <g>

* * *

Tidbit #7 

ObSenad: 

_tap_ tap _tap_ tap _tap_ tap _tap_ tap _tap_ _tap_ tap _tap_

When the soft sounds didn't stop after the span of several breaths, Jim sleepily hitched himself up and peered over the railing. 

Cross-legged on the couch below, laptop balanced across his thighs, Blair was busy tapping the keys. 

"Chief? Do it tomorrow, whatever it is, huh?" 

Blair tilted his head back against the cushions to look up, and smiled apologetically. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you up. But I'm almost done here." 

Jim sighed and took a moment to appreciate the way the angle showed off the line of his lover's throat. "Okay, then. What's so important?" 

"Well, it's not exactly life or death, but I happened to think about something that maybe some of the other people on the Watchman list would be interested in. 

"That other cop buddy show -- the one with the Mountie and the Chicago cop... err, the _two_ Chicago cops... same name, but different guys, but not exactly... uh... " Blair waved his hands in the air to indicate the confusing characters and grinned. "You know what I mean." 

"Yeah, I know. Good show. I like it, not as much as The Watchman, but it's good." 

"Yeah, well, you know I've been catching the reruns on that cable channel. And it's just about through the first cycle of episodes -- all three seasons, _including_ those four eps that we didn't get to see in the original syndication -- and it's about to start all over again, and I just thought that the others on the list who like it would maybe appreciate the reminder in time to get blank tapes, set the VCRs, stuff like that." 

"So how long could that take? You just told _me_ in two minutes." 

"Oh, that part's done already, but since it's an 'OT' post," here Blair embellished the air with two fingers of each hand, "I have to write a short fic piece too, to bring it back on topic. Kinda like doing 'em, really, but it takes a little longer. Almost done, though, give me a couple more minutes." His phrases got shorter as the keys resumed their tapping. Jim looked at the head that was now bent over in concentration, sighed again, and settled back to wait. 

Several minutes later the laptop whirred to a stop. Swift footsteps made their way up the stairs, and Jim pulled back the blankets as Blair slid into the bed. He gathered his Guide to him, and they nestled together with the ease of long companionship. 

Blair snuggled himself into a comfortable position against his favorite pillow and addressed the warm chest that lay beneath his cheek. "I needed to get it sent tonight, because on Sunday the listserver's being moved to a new office, and the list is going to be down for maybe a day or two." 

Jim nudged the tickly mass of hair under his chin. "At least it'll give you a chance to catch up." 

The half-chuckle, half-snort was more felt than heard. "Catch up? What's that? Never heard of it." 

The room was quiet for a moment, then lips brushed over Jim's chest in a brief kiss. His arms tightened contentedly around their contents. "Love you," he whispered. 

"Love you," Blair replied softly, as both of them surrendered to sleep. 

\--finis-- 

Noon  


* * *

Tidbit #8 

ObSenad: 

"Damnit it!" Blair cursed under his breath, examining the Christmas card in his hand. 

"What's the matter, babe?" Jim asked, walking over to him. 

"Someone from the list named JoAnn just sent me a check for the third season tapes of "The Watchman", but she didn't include her email addy, so I can't let her know the tapes are on the way!" 

"Don't you have her name on the list for tape requests?" Jim asked, leaning over Blair. Blair snorted. 

"Jim, I have SO many people on that list, and you KNOW most of them never send the check, how am I supposed to figure out which one she is?" 

"It says she's from Georgia....." 

"I know. Guess I'll just have to do an Obsenad, see if she'll get it." 

"Guess that's all you can do," Jim shrugged. He paused, then grinned. "Y'know, there IS something you CAN do right now to take your mind off it......" he said, sliding his arms around Blair, nuzzling his neck. 

"And what would THAT be, hmmmm?" Blair purred. 

"Oh, maybe something involving you, me, some handcuffs, and about a quart of body oil....." 

"I think that Obsenad can wait......." 

-finis- 

Jenny  


* * *

Tidbit #9 

ObSenad: The Twelve Slash Days of Christmas 

On the first day of Christmas, my lover gave to me a dildo with a battery.  
On the second day of Christmas, my lover gave to me two latex gloves.  
On the third day of Christmas, my lover gave to me three French kisses.  
On the fourth day of Christmas, my lover gave to me four dirty words.  
On the fifth day of Christmas, my lover gave to me five cock rings.  
On the sixth day of Christmas, my lover gave to me six rainbow pride flags.  
On the seventh day of Christmas, my lover gave to me seven Trojan condoms.  
On the eighth day of Christmas, my lover gave to me eight tubes of KY.  
On the ninth day of Christmas, my lover gave to me nine hours of foreplay.  
On the tenth day of Christmas, my lover gave to me ten smacks with a paddle.  
On the eleventh day of Christmas, my lover gave to me eleven erotic massages.  
On the twelfth day of Christmas, my lover gave to me twelve issues of Drummer. 

:-) 

Ann  


* * *

Tidbit #10 

ObSenad: 

"Hello? Yes, this is Blair Sandburg calling. I live in Cascade. Yes, I do vote. I just wanted to let the congresswoman know that I am _against_ impeachment. You have a nice day, too!" Blair hung up the phone and looked up at Jim, who had just walked in. 

"Chief, what are you doing?" 

"I'm calling my representatives. Liberal opinions have to be represented; the Christian Coalition is drowning the Congress in phone calls. We have to do what we can." 

"'We'?" Jim leaned against the table. "I may have voted for Clinton last time, but it wasn't like I had a lot of choice. And he did cheat on his wife, and he did lie about it. The guy's pretty much scum, Sandburg." 

"I'm not saying I approve of what he did with Monica, Jim. But think about it. Shouldn't a guy's sexual peccadilloes be his own business?" 

"'Peccadilloes'? You've been watching too much CNN." 

"Whatever. The point is, would you want the media coming into your bedroom? Why did you and Carolyn break up again, Jim? How many one-night stands have you had? And I don't see you shouting your latest relationship from the rooftops, either. Our closet's so big it's got an address." 

"We agreed that was best, Blair." Jim ran his hands through Blair's hair. "At least for now." 

"Yeah, well, maybe Hillary and Bill had worked all their bullshit out and didn't need it aired in public. Sometimes people make stupid decisions about their personal lives. It doesn't necessarily reflect on his ability to do his job. Which, all things considered, he does pretty well." 

"He's lacking in loyalty and integrity, and those are two things I'd like to see my president at least pretend that he has." 

Blair nodded, staring down at the long phone list of Washington representatives. "I agree with you there, man. It's just -- if they start by impeaching a president for his illicit affair, where does it stop? It's a dangerous, slippery slope that eventually leads to gay public employees losing their jobs, Jim, if the right wing takes over." Blair handed his lover the phone. 

Jim rolled his eyes, sighed, and started to dial. "Hello? My name is James Ellison..." 

\--the end-- 

Justine  


* * *

Tidbit #11 

Re: Buddy shows vs. the ensemble drama 

The author notes:  
...shows like Starsky  & Hutch and The Sentinel have different priorities and plotting frameworks than [shows like] Hill Street Blues. It's apples and oranges. But we could TRY it and see <g>

* * *

Episode #66 

A late night of paper grading leaves Blair exhausted and careless. Jim must cover for him during one of Major Crime's biggest busts when Blair stumbles over a perimeter alarm. Simon and Joan form a shaky truce for Daryl's benefit when Simon finds cocaine in Daryl's gym bag. Joel joins Weight Watchers and and all of Major Crime lays odds on his progress. 

Episode #71 

Det Rafe gets a new female partner, Gloria, but she only has eyes for Megan. Blair's petition for renewed observer status is granted but the Chief of Police exacts a private payment. Jim zones on a new brand of coffee in the break room, but Blair is nowhere to be found. Joel has GAINED five pounds and lost $75 in the office pool. Major snowfalls create havoc in Cascade and the power goes out in Major Crime. 

Episode #77 

When Daryl is among a group of juveniles arrested on suspicion of trafficking, Simon starts drinking again. Mattley and Del Vecchio help a bum find his lost daughter. Megan misses a month and can't remember what happened at the office New Year's party. Simon is inebriated when he appears at a hostage crisis and Jim takes over. Later, Jim finds out that Blair hasn't been turning up to class either. 

Episode #82 

Joel announces he has lost 5 pounds but is seen taking laxatives. Disturbed by the aromas in morning briefings, Mattley and Del Vecchio decide to melt down some Hershey's kisses and do a swap. Distraught at her unwanted pregnancy Megan asks Rafe to marry her. Confronted by the rape of his son in the aftermath of a prison attack, Simon goes on a binge. 

Episode #95 

When Blair is found dead OD'd on uppers, it looks like suicide but Jim thinks different. Jim is not happy with his new partner, an upstart female detective when they disagree on Jim's insistence on pursuing Blair's death as a homicide. Megan gets morning sickness. Joel has put on 10 pounds. Simon and Joan reconcile again at Blair's funeral. 

Episode #101 

Del Vecchio reveals a hidden talent for bootie knitting and Mattley accuses him of being a pansy. Jim and Rachel form an uneasy truce after she sees him zone and is able to help. Simon is promoted and Joel is offered his position as Captain of Major Crime but a minor cardiac episode leaves Joel's prospects for promotion slim and Simon returns to serve in his previous capacity until a replacement can be found. 

Episode #110 

Rafe and Megan's wedding nearly grinds to a halt when there is a global call-out on police for a terrorist kidnapping of a political official. Simon and Joel have a major disagreement on procedure. The wedding goes ahead only 12 hours late and Jim and Rachel have a meeting of hearts across the floral strewn aisle of the wedding breakfast. Rafe's partner Gloria is the only one who objects to the union and says so. 

\--end?-- 

Kaz  


* * *

Tidbit #12 

ObSenad: 

The loft, 8.18 pm. The two guys are watching television. 

The program wasn't that interesting and so Blair started to watch his friend. Suddenly he snickered. Jim looked up, just wanting to take a swig of his beer. He saw that Blair was laughing at him. 

"What's so funny, Sandburg. Care to tell me?" he said annoyed. 

"I was wondering how you would look in a dress." Blair explained grinning. 

Jim made big eyes. "Awful! I can promise you that." Then he drank his beer. "Where does suddenly come from? Is it a new kink of yours? Muscular guys in drag?" 

Blair laughed. "Nah. A friend of mine had a book with him today about the history of female impersonations. The Great Pretenders. With lots of pics. Ever since, I find myself wondering what my male friends might look like, you know, like that." Blair cupped his hands in front of his chest. 

Jim shook his head, but Blair rambled on. "Did you know where the drag queens came from? They were with minstrel shows and...." 

"This might be really interesting, but I liked to watch the show." Jim interrupted him. 

Blair was quiet, for about 20 seconds, a new record. He was really slowing down since he began living with this cop. "Have you ever dressed up as a woman?" 

Jim opened his mouth to order Blair to be quiet, when his brain registered the question. 

"No!" He said it too fast. Shit! 

Blair scooted closer with gleaming eyes. "Tell me about it. Was it in vice? Undercover, right? Have you pictures?" 

Jim wished desperately for a distraction. Maybe a serial killer, a bombing or another spreading disease. No such luck. He sighed. 

"Was it that bad? The high heels killed you? Right?" Blair looked sincere. 

"Yeah. I almost broke my neck when I had to fight and run in those damn shoes." 

Blair was now practically sitting on his lap and hung at his lips. Jim felt sudden pride when he remembered this disaster. 

"Okay. We tried to catch this perp. The new faces on the force had to go undercover and watch the streets. I ended up in this mini mini-skirt and high heels." Jim held his hand up to indicate how high. "I tore the tights immediately. It looked awful. I had this big red wig. And even though they laid layers of make-up on me and stuffed me with big boobs, only someone half blind could have mistaken me as a woman." Jim sighed again. 

"Wow, that must have been hard. I've once tried to walk in the high heels of a girlfriend. I sprained my ankle. Are there any pictures?" Blair asked hopefully. 

Jim searched the face of his friend and made a decision. He went up to his bedroom and came back with three pictures. Two showed him standing in the street with other cops in drag. One showed him alone in a close up shot. Blair got his glasses and studied them. A slightly younger Ellison laughed shyly into the camera. The legs were great, but the bulging biceps and the mighty neck were so male. Blair smiled. 

"What?" Jim asked. 

Blair grasped Jim's upper arm. "Nice face and legs, but too much of that!" 

Jim grinned. "So that's what you think of impersonation, nice legs. What about you? If you would get rid of your sideburns and chest hair." With that he tucked at some strands peeking out of the shirt. Blair patted his hand away. "You would be a nice woman. Even I would ask out." 

Blair made a dramatic face. "So, you would only date me if I were female. How sexist of you. That's discrimination, I hadn't asked to be a man." 

"I didn't mean it like that. I meant... I think... If you were a woman you would like men, right? So we could date." Jim thought it didn't sound as logical as he meant it. 

Blair shook his head. "What if I were lesbian." 

Jim frowned. "So, if you were a woman you would like to be lesbian? If I were a woman I would still like men." 

Blair blinked at him. He wasn't sure what he had heard, it had sounded slightly confused. Jim stared at the pictures in his hands. 

"No. I think I would be bi. I like men and women." Blair said calmly. 

Jim looked up in the eyes of his friend and smiled softly. "Me too." 

Blair snuggled closer, threw his head back and asked: "Would you like to see me in drag?" 

Jim studied his hairy partner. "Ahem. I'm _not_ sure about it. Unless I can undress you afterwards." 

"Done!" 

\--end-- 

Angelika  


* * *

End Sentinel Tidbits File # 47.

 


End file.
